California is a no-fault divorce state. What does this mean? This means that the spouse asking for a divorce does not have to prove that the other spouse did something wrong. A no-fault divorce means that the couples can avoid the nastiness of proving one party “breached” the marital contract.
Although parties no longer have to prove that one party is to blame for the breakdown of the marriage, many clients still have a difficult time coming to terms with the concept of no-fault. They want to place blame or process why the divorce happened. Clients often feel a need to give “their side of the story” to “explain how the marriage failed” and “why the divorce is necessary”. Divorcing spouses often can’t come to terms or closure with finalizing the divorce without expressing what they experienced as the reason for the divorce or what they feel is the fault of the other spouse.
Many times the divorce process is prolonged or the divorce becomes adversarial because a spouse needs some way to express who is at fault and what went wrong in the marriage. When a divorcing spouse does not have this opportunity to share their experience of what went wrong it can lead to frustration and frustration can lead to unnecessary roadblocks, delays and additional pain and expense. This one issue can make a divorce cost 2 to 3 times more.
How do you move forward beyond blame? Read Carol Delzer’s book “Divorce Done Easier” it provides advice for divorcing spouses to move beyond the blame and fault. Carol also recommends in her book how to find the right divorce coach or Marriage Therapist to talk to. Or come to see Carol Delzer in person for both legal and emotional advice on how to move forward with your divorce.
Call for a consultation with Carol Delzer, at Family Law Center 916.488.5088